First of all, just a reminder that if you would like to donate to Autism Research and support Team Grasshopper in this year's Autism Walk, please click on the link to the right. It will be up there until the walk.

I'd probably have posted sooner, but I've been in Schenectady since yesterday and by the time I've had on line time, I'm too damn tired. Even over the weekend, I just didn't feel like getting on line with everything going on. However, I've used my few quiet moments out here as a sort of mini-retreat.

You see, I think I had a revelation on Sunday. This weekend was the weekend we play at Sunday evening Mass for one of a group of churches. Something the priest said during the homily really hit me.

Just to give a little background, I've probably been a real snot around the house for the last few months. I won't give too much detail, but suffice it to say the Wife has had many reasons to hit me over the head. At one point, she said something to me, probably in frustration, but basically saying to get my shit together. But she said something very specific that I recall that had been rolling around in my brain for weeks now.

Well, during Sunday's homily, one of the points the priest was making concerned how if we always think about what we want, you end up miserable and only when you think of other's first are you truely happy and blessing start being heaped upon you. It was like that proverbial lightning bolt. I'd realized all the stuff I'd been stressing about and being annoyed and surly about all centered around me.

So I've been meditating on this the last few days. I need to let go of all the "me" stuff. Sounds easy in theory, I know, but I know it's the right thing to do. Every good thing I've recieved over the years have come when I let go of whatever the thing is that's stressing me and leaving it to the Lord to work out for me. EVERY TIME, things have turned out far above anything I could have expected. So that's what I need to do. Let it all go, and stop thinking of me first. I don't think it will be easy, but what choice is there. The Wife told me to do A, B, or figure something out. Unfortunately, A and B were not options, and I couldn't figure something out. So I won't. I'll let the Lord figure it out.

So pray for me that the Lord shows me the way. Because I'm really tired of being pissy and difficult at home all the time. And I think the Wife is sick of me being a pain in the ass.


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