I probably shouldn't write this, but...

Here goes.

As you can see, I've been on a bit of a theological bent lately. What with all the goings on in Rome, I've been a little reflective. I mentioned something in a comment from the previous post and felt I should expand on it, my thoughts on sex and marriage. I've talked a little about what the church teaches, so now I thought it's time to state my opinion.

Since I'm probably about to alienate or insult some of my readers, first comes all the disclaimers. I do not believe that those that do not share these views are wrong or necessarily sinful. I do not claim be the final authority on truth. I fully respect everyone's views, even if they differ from my own. I do not believe in shouting down opinions that differ from my own and enjoy open discussion. To sum up, I'm not telling anyone that their relationships are wrong if they don't agree with what I'm about to say.

I've come to believe that sex outside of marriage is wrong (ok, there, I said it). Now, before you ask, my wife and I were not married the first time we had sex. (As an interesting side note, the date we got married was the same as the first time we had sex.) At the time I was probably what the Retropolitan has accused me of being, a secular humanist. I really hadn't rediscovered my faith yet. Over the years, praying and reflecting on that faith has brought me to this new conclusion.

Let me expand just a bit. As a Christian, I don't know how anyone can seriously call themselves one and believe sex outside of marriage is morally acceptable. Every Christian denomination agrees that Jesus opposed sex outside of marriage. He was very clear on divorce as well, though that's another subject. Anyway, it's quite clear that God intended that two should become one in marriage and that sex is an expression of this unity. Until marriage, this unity does not exist and it isn't appropriate to have sex.

For those that are not Christians, it is a matter of conscience. However, I think in general Western culture puts too much emphasis on casual sex. Many of the social issues we face today, abortion, teen pregnancy, dead beat dads, stem from irresponsible sex. We don't teach our children that sex is something sacred and really important and not just another pleasure. If more people took marriage more seriously, waited longer to get married and have sex, then perhaps we wouldn't have some of the issues we face. I've always believed that you should not just treat the symptoms of a problem, but attack the cause. Our attitudes toward sex is one of the causes that have created our current social situation.

Does that make sex bad? No. Am I saying that no one should have sex unless they're married? No. Again, I wouldn't presume to speak for everyone. However, I think if more people thought longer and harder about sex and marriage before engaging in either, our world would be a much better place. I may seem to be trying to straddle the fence here and it's a tough call for me. On the one hand, as I said, I really think that sex should be reserved for marriage. However, the liberal in me says it's not my place to judge others or to push my morality on anyone. So I simply throw this out there for anyone reading to chew on. Have you ever really thought about it that way? Have you ever agonized the decision about having sex with someone who is willing prior to actually doing it?

OK, I'm going to go jump in my fox hole now and cover my head. Hopefully I'll still be here when the smoke clears. INCOMING!


Popular Posts